Sometimes in the effort to forgive others, we fall into a trap of ruminating over something that has hurt us over and over and over again. And I’ve been catching myself doing this recently in an effort to fully forgive and release a particular situation, but instead only digging the trench deeper, hiding behind justifications for why I am right to feel hurt and confronted.

I’ve been giving this situation WAY too much thought, and I know this, but I’ve built this habit of thinking about it the same way, which means I haven’t been able to make any progress in my effort to release the situation from my heart + mind + body.

So in class with my dear teacher Elena Brower yesterday, a particular teaching struck me straight to the core. We were riffing on what forgiveness means in our bodies when Elena shared this piece of wisdom (I’m paraphrasing):

If someone is taking up too much mental real estate over the course of your week, it’s time for a conversation to happen.

And by a conversation, we clearly mean THE conversation: the conversation you are scared shitless to have. The conversation that seems impossible (i.e. No, s/he would NEVER talk about that). The conversation that involves cutting through the deep crap. The conversation that requires us to own and take responsibility for our dynamic and actions in a relationship. The conversation that, hi, moves us toward forgiveness.

There’s a saying that where the attention goes, the prana flows. (Prana being the life force energy that makes this whole shindig happen). So when you divert your attention to a situation, you’re already starting the process of making a shift. You’re diverting energy to the space that is ready to open up and heal.

The question is: are you ready to make that shift? Are you truly willing to look at what is bothering you? Do you really understand how your pain feels in your body + mind?

To answer these questions honestly is to set yourself up for a monumentally healing change in your life. Because when we’re willing to go into our s***, were no longer at its mercy. It’s easy to hide behind justifications, or vengeful + victimized thinking. It’s really easy to feel right. And maybe someone or something did really hurt you. Maybe something happened that really was unfair. Maybe life really did just hand you an s*** sandwich. But what is more healing: being happy or being right? 

What is more productive for you in the long run: being a victim living in pain or learning to overcome pain and challenges with grace and gratitude?

As yogis, we practice ahimsathe principle of non-violence or non-harm. And that usually comes pretty easily when we think of other beings. We can become vegetarians to reduce the suffering of animals. We can be kind and courteous to others. We can do charitable work. We can be nice and sweet and all of these things. But what of ourselves? If we are ruminating on painful things, and wallowing in past emotions, justifying why we deserve to be unhappy or vengeful.what harm is that inducing in our own beings?

The act of forgiving others + forgiving ourselves is the antidote. And that means taking an action you haven’t taken before because they are no longer fully serving you if you are still obsessively thinking about a particular situation. picking up the phone. Sending the email. Writing the letter. Tell this other person in whatever way they can hear you that you release them of the hold they have on your mind + body. Tell them you release yourself of the judgments you have made on your own behavior. Tell them that you are ready to choose to be happy over being right and that you truly wish the same for them, but do not expect them to make the choice until they are open and willing in their own bodies and time.

It is terrifying, yes, to confront those who bring you pain. But remember that you are bringing yourself pain, too, by brooding over these perceived injustices. Take care of yourself first: forgive what needs to be forgiven, and allow the train of forgiveness to seep into the other dimensions of your life.

These situations and relationships are brought into our lives to teach us something. By showing up for your lesson and assimilating what you learn into your everyday actions, you will set the example for those who are ready to forgive, to choose to be happy over being right, to Love, and most of all: to Heal.

Forgiveness is acquired.  It is not inherent in the mind, which cannot sin.  As sin is an idea you taught yourself, forgiveness must be learned by you as well, but from a Teacher other than yourself, who represents the other Self in you.  Through [this teacher] you learn how to forgive the self you think you made, and let it disappear. 

{{ a course in miracles }}

I’ve included a meditation for you take with you and explore the notion of forgiveness in your body. May it serve you and bring healing to your heart.


{ sat nam + namaste }…

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YO lovely healthies.  If you’re not hip to Gabrielle Bernstein yet, then you are in for a treat.  She is throwing down some awesome knowledge about the key steps to manifesting your desires! In this Q & A Gabrielle gives us crucial guidance on how to truly manifest and achieve our goals in 2013. To top it off she’s also offering an FREE group-coaching course in December on the topic of manifesting.

She is such an inspiring spiritual leader for our time and generation.  Check out the Q&A and get manifesting, sweet people!

You are a self-proclaimed manifesting maven. Can you demystify this topic for us? 

Gab: We are always manifesting. Each thought we have creates an energy flow within and around our physical being. This energy attracts its likeness. So if you’re thinking, “I suck,” then your energy kinda, well, sucks and you attract sucky experiences.

The opposite experience occurs when you think high-level thoughts like, “I rock!” When you think and feel, “I rock,” you exude an energy of confidence and in turn attract great experiences into your life. Each thought you have informs your energy, and your energy manifests into your experiences. Your thoughts and energy create your reality.

You talk about manifesting mishaps. Can you tell us more about this? 

Gab: Manifestation has become a buzzword lately. Though it’s totally awesome that the Law of Attraction is now trendy, it also can be a bit misleading for folks who are unwilling to do the heavy lifting. If you truly want to use your energetic power to manifest greatness, you must clear all that blocks you from believing in your greatness.

A Course in Miracles teaches that on some level, you’ve asked for everything that happens in your life. Your intentions create your reality. There’s no need to beat yourself up: simply recognizing how your low-level thoughts negatively affect your life is the first powerful step toward changing your experiences. Begin your manifesting process by getting honest about how your low-level thoughts, energy, and feelings of disbelief block you from receiving what you desire. Once you get clear about the blocks, you can begin to clean them up to clear space for positive manifestations to occur.

Many people, when trying to manifest, focus too much on the outside form rather than the internal condition. From A Course in Miracles perspective, what’s important is our internal experience: whether we choose to experience love or fear. When we commit to our internal experience of love, we begin to attract more love. Many people approach manifestation from a place of “How can I get something to feel better?” Instead, the focus should be: “How can I feel better and therefore be an energetic match for attracting more greatness into my life?” The emphasis must be placed on healing the internal condition, not getting a hot new car or boyfriend.

You have Five Principles for Manifesting Your Desires can you share them with us? 

Gab: Here are my five key principles for genuine manifesting. When practicing these steps, make sure to stay committed to the goal of feeling good first and attracting stuff second. Continue to remind yourself that when you feel good you energetically attract goodness into your life. When your primary function is to be happy, then whatever comes to you is irrelevant. Happiness is your true manifestation.

Principle One: Clear Space

Before you begin the manifestation process you must take the necessary time to release all your disbelief in your power to be happy. One of the best ways to clear the blocks of disbelief is to pray for release. Begin a daily prayer practice of asking the Universe to set you free from all the limiting beliefs that block you from believing in your greatness. Stay open for signs from the Universe and show up for the assignments that are brought to you. Universal assignments come in many forms. Maybe you’re guided to the relationship that brings up all your shit so that you have to finally heal your fear. Or maybe you lose your job so that you can learn the lessons of self-reliance and strengthen your self-love. Trust that these assignments, however tough at times, are incredible opportunities for you to clean your energy and clear space to call in what you desire.

Your job in this step is to pray for guidance to clear all that blocks you from believing in your greatness. Then allow the Universe to help guide you to whatever assignments you need to aid in the healing process. Show up for the assignments and trust that the more you clean your thoughts and energy, the more positive experiences you will attract into your life.

Principle Two: Get Clear

Clarity is king when it comes to manifesting your desires. You must have clear intentions for what you want to call otherwise you can manifest a lot of what you don’t want. Focus on what you desire and then make a list of all that goes along with it. If you’re getting clear about the job you want, make a list of all the things about the job that make you happy: the office, the people, the salary, etc. Be unapologetic about what you want. This list helps you clarify your intentions and access a vibrant mental picture of what you desire.

The most important part of this step is to clarify how you want to feel. When you get clear on how you want to feel, you can begin to access that feeling. That feeling is what makes the manifestation come into form. You can write a thousand lists and make a million vision boards, but if you don’t clearly feel what you want to experience, it will never truly manifest into form.

Principle Three: Think It, Feel It, Believe It!

Now let’s put these steps together. Take your clear intention and spend time every day sitting in the feeling of what it is that you desire. You might access the feeling through meditation and visioning exercises. Or call on the feeling when you’re in nature or doing a form of exercise you love. Let the thought inform the feeling and let the feeling take over your energy. The more you feel the feeling of what you desire, the more you believe it is on the way. From a metaphysical perspective, if you believe it then it is already here. So make time for contemplating, thinking, feeling and believing. 

Principle Four: Chill!

The next step is crucial to the manifestation process. In order to truly manifest your desires into form, you gotta chill out! A Course in Miracles teaches: “Those who are certain of the outcome can afford to wait and wait without anxiety.” Take this message with you and allow your faithfulness to guide you into the belief that what you desire is on the way. Also, trust that the Universe has a much better plan than you do. Though you are clear about what you want, you cannot control the timing or the form in which it comes. Stay calm, relax and trust that the Universe has your back! 

Principle Five: Know the Universe Has Your Back

When you’re in the know you’re deliberate about what you want. When you’re in the know you no longer vibrate energy of fear or disbelief. You just know. As your disbelief wilts away, wanting is replaced by knowing. Getting into the know happens naturally. When you diligently practice steps one through four, you will clean house, get clear and feel happier. This process is healing and powerful, and it leads to a deep inner knowing that you are right where you need to be. Accepting your greatness in this moment, right now, is what manifests more greatness. Being in the know helps you accept that you already are living in your desired manifestation. When you feel it, you live regardless of what is happening on the outside. In time, the Universe catches up with your energy and your desires come into form. This process of allowing the manifestation to follow your internal faith is the true process of co-creation.

Stay Committed to Happiness 

Stay committed to this five-step process and trust that you’re exactly where you need to be. Is your main desire to feel good? Trust you will be given everything you need to create that feeling. Know that feeling good is the true manifestation and everything else is the icing on the already delicious cake!

Next week you’re offering a free course in Manifesting. Can you tell us more about this? 

Gab: If you want to learn more about Manifesting you can get two free video coaching sessions on the topic. December 3rd and 12th I’m leading a course called How to Manifest Your Desires in 2013! The course is free when you order my new book May Cause Miracles. You will also receive my guided meditations, audiobook intro, and Authentic Power lecture. To learn more about the course click here.

To pre-order the book and get your gifts & course click here. And Gabby has shared this phenomenal meditation video below, all about the magic of manifesting!…

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Yogi friends in NYC, it is my pleasure to announce a benefit yoga extravaganza on Thursday to help raise money for Sandy Relief efforts.

The good people at Alignyo have put together a killer lineup of teachers: Anita Goa, Halle Becker, KK Clivio, Elena Brower & Schuyler Grant. All details can be found here.

Two classes, five teachers, $30 each.  More love than you could possibly imagine.

Registration is open and going quickly!  Save your mat space now :)



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There’s a fundamental of yogic philosophy that has struck a chord with me in the last two weeks of my teacher training: Recognize that the other person is you.

It’s a powerful idea in its own right to keep in your heart, but the word recognize is pretty key here, too. It’s a mandate—a ‘call to arms of the soul’ variety. Put in the work to actively recognize that every other single human being on this Earth is the same as you are.

We are made of the same stuff of the Universe.

We struggle the same.

We love the same.

We fear the same.

We start the same.

We end the same.

We are the same.

Take a person that has been rubbing you the wrong way, or perhaps getting in your way somehow. Confront that feeling, ask yourself the necessary questions: What is it about this person that makes me feel x,y,z? Do the work. It’s scary and uncomfortable, but your growth and healing depend on it.

I can guarantee with as much certainty as my own limited life experience has confirmed, that whatever it is that person that makes you feel less than great is 100% more to do with you than them. Because you’re seeing a part of yourself that you’re not thrilled with. And that’s okay. This is how we learn. And then heal. And then love. Because we’re the same as the people who irk and hurt us. Bless and thank these people for being our teachers, for reminding us of our humanity instead of getting pissed and holding on to grudges or feelings of fear and guilt.

Now take a person you love, or someone you admire and respect very much. The converse applies. If you see nothing but sunshine and roses when thinking of someone, you’re looking at qualities you also embody. You’re looking at greatness expressed by someone who has the exact amount of potential that you do…they’ve just made it physical.

When you love someone, you’re looking at a reflection of the love you hold in your own heart. Bless and thank these people for being our teachers, for showing us our capacity to love, to behave with the highest integrity to what we stand for, to live up to our potential, and to dream without fear, restraint, or any hint of backing down.

When you take the step to recognize this key truth, that every person on the planet is a reflection of you, you are taking a huge step on behalf of humanity. You’re taking a stand for your families, your loved ones, your brothers and sisters everywhere. You’re moving from a place of reaction, comparison, and squandering to a place of healing, growth, and honest-to-goodness transcendence. On the real.

Love is reflected in Love, Light in Light, Forgiveness in Forgiveness, Greatness in Greatness.

Awesome in Awesome.

You in the other person.

And you are all beautiful creatures, each and everyone. Let each other know.


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